(#23) What I want to matter to me...

Years ago, when I was young in ministry, I wrote a life-motto I wanted to be a guide for my existence. Here it is: “I have decided; what matters to God will matter to me. Nothing else really matters.” I even had it translated into Russian and printed twice. One plaque is on my study wall and another on a wall of my brother pastor in Ukraine. 

There are so many things we give our life to that really don’t matter in the light of God’s desires for us. I wonder about some things, but I know the greatest portion of the things God says are important to me. They’re outlined rather fully in my Bible as I study the wonderful love, grace and character of God Who has revealed His heart. However long or short my life might be, I deeply desire it to be invested (time, talent and treasure) in things of eternal value – things that matter to God. 

It's been a full year since I published anything in the Cancer Journey Blog. And it’s really because life has settled in to a rather predictable routine. Blood test & Chemo every 3 weeks – scans and oncology visit every 2 to 3 months. There have been two anxious episodes where the CT scan identified somethings small but new. I called our Elders both times who laid hands, anoint and pray for me (James 5:13-15). Those prayer times were some of the sweetest moments of my life; and at my next scan, those new anomalies could not even be found. Praise God for answering yours and their prayers. 

Honestly, even with all the medical stuff, life is amazingly good. My only side effects from cancer or treatment are a night of sleeplessness and a day of tiredness and crabbiness. Even treatment is way easier for me than for most. For a half an hour I’m on a drip of Leucovorin. Then the nurses double glove and double gown to hook me up to a 46 hour IV pump of Fluorouracil (5-FU) (pretty toxic stuff). I’m only in the infusion clinic for under an hour. I carry the little round pump in a little cloth pouch under my shirt. Harriet and I disconnect from the pump two days later. Compared to most on IV Chemotherapy, mine is a breeze. 

In all of my health challenges two thoughts give me great comfort. While like everyone, I’m going to die someday (cancer or something else is bound to get me) – but like anyone who has personally received the Savior and experienced the cleansing of his cross, I have God’s promise of eternal life. It gets better from here. And the same God who has comforted, strengthened and inspired millions of believers for two thousand years is faithful to comfort, strengthen and inspire me. If you don’t have that kind of assurance, I’d love to talk and help you with that. Drop me a note.

<pastorstevemn@gmail.com>  (or msg me on facebook)

I am holding on to faith, ‘Cause I know You’ll make a way. 

I don't always understand, I don't always get to see 

But I will believe it, I will believe it.  

You make mountains move, You make giants fall. 

You use songs of praise, To shake prison walls. 

I will speak to my fear, I will preach to my doubt, 

You were faithful then, You'll be faithful now.

I am standing on Your word, Calling heaven down to earth, 

You will fight my enemies, this will end in victory. 

I will believe it, Yes, I will believe it.

 

And I know – You know, You never fail. 

And I know – You know, You never will.  – 

    "Faithful Now" - Vertical Worship